Made It Through Christmas

I thought I would share with you all a bit about my Christmas. I have had to stop my antidepressants because of the side effects  (problems with my blood clotting). I was expecting Christmas to be very hard because of this. 

I spent Christmas with my ex, my son, and my ex’s mum and husband. I was expecting to spend it alone because of the current situation. I was made to feel like part of the family and not and outsider. 

I was expecting to feel down because of no medication but I seem to be doing OK with out it. Will keep you all updated on my progress. 


A Roller-coaster of a Year !!

As we head to the end of 2016 I sit here thinking about just how hard this year has been. So many down’s and not enough up’s. This year has been one of the hardest of my life and one of the hardest decision I made this year was to continue when all I wanted to do was end it.

2017 has got to be better, it can’t be any worse !

What a difference one year can make to someone’s life. This year I have had an operation on my arm. Lost a lot of friends and family over the course of the year or maybe I just found out who my true friends were. I have gone from being an outgoing friendly person to someone who couldn’t go out without having an panic attack and am suffering depression to the point I didn’t want to be here any more.

I am not the same person I was in January 2016 but hopefully I will be sitting here this time next year saying the same thing !!

Hiding behind a mask

I spend a lot of time doing this as I’m sure many of us do, but why do we do it ? 

Is it because if everyone saw the real us they would run away ? is it because it will make them uncomfortable ? 

Many people have commented that I’m being very open and honest about my struggles but why should we not talk about mental health we talk about physical health. Why is it still such a taboo to talk about mental health. 

People when faced with someone with depression, anxiety and /or panic attacks will either be overwhelmed by it or the other type of people will carry on as if nothing is wrong as they have their own agender for the meeting or time with you. Neither of these are helpful.

It’s helpful to be able to talk about our problems without the other person going to pieces or without them acting like there is no problem at all. 

This is why we hide behind a mask of being okay and the stigma continues.